You’ve been afraid and lonely. You know how it feels. You know that, all at once, fear and loneliness can take control. It’s like your limbs lift and suddenly you’re a puppet for that plum sitting on your brainstem (your lizard brain).
Fear and loneliness, often deeply embedded by past conditioning, can drive people to act or speak in ways that contradict their beliefs, values, and character. These actions stem from an aching vulnerability or need for connection. Over time, these coping mechanisms can drag people into patterns of behavior that’s out of step with their identity.
Examples:
- A relative suddenly aligns with an extreme political movement.
- A rational friend starts to indulge conspiracy theories (That goddamn Bigfoot is controlling our mortgage rates!).
- A colleague becomes unusually hostile or competitive.
- A loved one begins gossiping or stoking drama within your family.
For those you care about, it may be worth intervening. Give them grace. Try to understand what may be driving their uncharacteristic actions. Remember how frustrating (and common) it is to act in ways that you know are out of step with your ideal self.
And remember that fear and loneliness are weaponized. Media platforms exploit these vulnerabilities to simulate connection, stoke outrage, capture attention (sell advertising), and manipulate us into spreading more of the same. They want you by the short hair. As an old saying goes, “Politics is the art of marshaling hatreds.” So many entities in this world are incentivized to get a crowbar under your forebrain and pry you into acting without thinking.
“Fear is the most valuable commodity in the universe.”
~Max Brooks, World War Z (Book)
“Politics is the art of marshaling hatreds.”
~Unknown
